I had a lot of things on my list this year
I'd trade 'em all to make you disappear
For all the times that you popcorn strung me along
Through all that egg nog too strong last song long con prolong headstrong too late I’m gone

We are breaking up for Christmas
You won’t even get a lump of coal
We are breaking up for Christmas
And may St Nicholas judge your filthy soul

I think you’ve been just a bit too jolly
Letting other guys hang your holly
And every time we talk you make it a fight
I just want to have a silent night

We are breaking up for Christmas
Can you hear the sleigh bells ring?
We are breaking up for Christmas
They’re on the lawn with the rest of your things

There’s something wrong deep in your hippocampus
When you’re on your period I call you Krampus
But when you’re gone I know I’m gonna miss you
And that’s how I know that I’ve got issues pull through screw you thank you untrue grab the tissues

Hanging Christmas lights alone is the loneliest job that you’ll ever know
All my Yuletide cheer is gone cuz you’re not here
I never want you back, you mistletoe megalomaniac
So we’re breaking up for Christmas
We’re breaking up, Yes we are breaking up
We’re breaking up for Christmas

We are breaking up for Christmas
You and me, we’re breaking up
We are breaking up for Christmas
I’m not waiting for a better time
Cause I think I’m gonna lose my mind
It’s gonna be my favorite time all year